safety

Safe words- aka traffic light system and why it’s my favourite

Safe words- aka traffic light system and why it’s my favourite

Safe words are just that, words that we use to be able to call (or stop) a scene when we need to, to make a scene safe for us to be vulnerable in and perhaps push our boundaries in a way that feels controlled. 

Safe words are used to relay information regarding how someone is fairing in a kink scene, or for a top to check in with a submissive or bottom whilst in a kink scene. Safe words are words we use to indicate when we need play to stop, or keep going. These can take a variety of form and are often used because when playing with kink, words like stop, might not mean stop. 

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Hard limits

Hard limits

Hard limits are things (be they actions, words, items or spaces) which an individual does not wish to use in kinky play. A hard limit could be literally anything, some of the most common ones I have come across when negotiating play scenes have been: tickling; spitting; blood; humiliation; pain; golden showers; caning; claustrophobia… 

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